Military History | How To Make War | Wars Around the World Rules of Use How to Behave on an Internet Forum
Military Jokes and Humor Discussion Board
   Return to Topic Page
Subject: More French Bashing (all in good fun...)
    12/18/2005 6:58:38 PM


"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by prostitutes." Mark Twain.

 

 

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me." General George S. Patton.

 

 

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld.

 

 

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it."  Marge Simpson

 

 

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure" Jacques Chirac, President of France

 

"As far as France is concerned, you're right."  Rush Limbaugh,

 

 

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee."  Regis Philbin.

 

 

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whisky I don't know."  P.J O'Rourke (1989).

 

 

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it."  John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona.

 

 

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein?  Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people."  Conan O'Brien

 

 

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of  Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get Hitler out of France either"  Jay Leno.

 

 

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag."  David Letterman

 

 

Only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada.  Ted Nugent.

 

 

War without France would be like ... uh ... World War II.

 

“The favorite bumper sticker in Washington D.C. right now is one that says 'First Iraq, then France.” Tom Brokaw.

 

 

"What do

 
Quote    Reply

Show Only Poster Name and Title     Newest to Oldest
Pages: 1 2
Thomas3    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   12/21/2005 10:26:38 PM
"I've never met a Frenchman I didn't like." Hannibal the Cannibal
 
Quote    Reply

Francois    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   12/27/2005 12:51:30 AM
Well, being french has good points too. - We know what is good food. - We know the meaning of holidays and leasure. - We can get girls in a stiffy (especially foreign girls, yes, yours). - We know what is good style (p.e. fashion). - We don't make war, we win them. Making the others to fight for us. - We know what good wine is. - We understand elegancy and beauty. - We have taste for beautifull buildings. Try finding one people who has two of these qualities at once.
 
Quote    Reply

Thomas3    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   12/27/2005 9:56:41 PM
Point taken; but I'm not so sure: 1. Snails and frogs - good food, well them you must love rotted seal-gut. 2. Well compared to the Germans that can make anything hard work. 3. My problem with french girl has been to keep them at a distance -they are rather bossy. 4. some of us prefer a haircut. 5. What about the Citroën 2CV???? 5. You cannot beat Denmark for that one! 6. Perhaps, as you tend to export the bad ones: Or is an ambition to be petroleum exporter. Chateaux Caïx (Cahors) springs to mind. 7. The Eiffel Tower???????????
 
Quote    Reply

Mex101    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   1/11/2006 7:20:48 PM
Dear Francois. If you ever read this, I am 100% Mexican and we know how to get amircan wemon. France made war agianst Mexico in the 1860's. It also lost. Have you ever seen my country? We new how to make pyramids when you were still pooping in out houses, we have beautifull buildins and only lost one war to an other nation. We are not war like. Ask anyone in the New world what they think about Mexican Food. And Mexicans always have family fun in holidays... any holidays. Beat that?
 
Quote    Reply

Yimmy    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   1/11/2006 7:47:50 PM
"We new how to make pyramids when you were still pooping in out houses" So, you shat in pyramids?
 
Quote    Reply

Mex101    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   1/12/2006 6:23:41 PM
That's a good question, and funny too. What i mint was that durinf the 12th-13th century the aztecs( and mayans since they too lived in Mexico) Built huge and Roman like cities when the french were just starting to build Notre Damme wich is cmaller than some pyramids. aqueducts,wich in the long its like plumbing, were also made but not at the same scale that Rome did. The French didn't dvelope any of this for nor did for many years. Another French Joke, after all this is about the French, Wy couldn't the Russians destroy Nepolean's troops? Because They couldn't chase them for ever!
 
Quote    Reply

Mex101    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   1/12/2006 6:29:21 PM
I fixed some errors from my last Thread for anyone who cares. That's a good question, and funny too. What I meant was that during the 12th-13th century the aztecs( and mayans since they too lived in Mexico) Built huge and Roman like cities when the french were just starting to build Notre Damme wich is smaller than some pyramids. aqueducts,wich in the long its like plumbing, were also made but not at the same scale that Rome did. The French didn't dvelope any of this nor did so for many years. Another French Joke, after all this is about the French, Wy couldn't the Russians destroy Nepolean's troops? Because They couldn't chase them for ever!
 
Quote    Reply

joe6pack    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   1/13/2006 10:09:23 AM
> The Train Ride (aka-the short mystery) > > > > Sitting together on a train, traveling through the Swiss Alps, are > a French man, an American man, an old Greek woman and a young > blonde beautiful Swiss girl. > > > > The train goes into a dark tunnel and a few seconds later there is > a the sound of a loud slap. > > > > When the train emerges from the tunnel, the Frenchman has a bright > red hand print on his cheek. No one speaks. > > > > The old Greek woman thinks: The Frenchman must have groped the > blonde in the dark, and she slapped his cheek. > > > > The blonde Swiss girl thinks: That Frenchman must have tried to > grope me in the dark, but missed and fondled the old lady and she > slapped his cheek. > > > > The Frenchman thinks: The American must have groped the blonde in > the dark. She tried to slap him but missed and got me instead. > > > > The American thinks: I can't wait for another tunnel, so I can > slap that Frenchman again.
 
Quote    Reply

Ehran    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   1/13/2006 11:54:06 AM
i think notre dam would qualify as more techically demanding than building a pyramid. fwiw i would take mexican food over french any day of the week especially given the ridiculous pricing of french food.
 
Quote    Reply

Mex101    RE:More French Bashing (all in good fun...)   1/13/2006 5:06:45 PM
Ehran, first thats true Secand Pyramids were finished first Third French use high prices to make the food taste good :)
 
Quote    Reply
1 2



 Latest
 News
 
 Most
 Read
 
 Most
 Commented
 Hot
 Topics